I’ve moved back to the country for the week. Seems I was only visiting our own place for the weekend and felt my stomach drop by the thought of staying. The other one’s headed out for work today and’ll be gone all week and I seem to start leaking any fucking moment left on my own. So it seemed like a good idea.
All of my family is home. Which is so rare for many families. Not ours. And it’s a blessing and a curse. We all get into each other’s business. We all postpone whatever’s weighing us down on the great Outside. We only want to spend time together. That’s why it’s so hard for us to be alone I think. We’re so used to us being there and we’re so dependent on each other. When we’re together we feel stronger and happier, than we actually are even! Not that I don’t think I’m my true self when I’m with them, but it sure is a different self who greets the world. A smaller self.
I know I’d struggle alone these days. And am always pulled towards destruction. When dealt with stuff through destructive ways for so long -that’s the only way I’ve achieved control amongst all this mess. Plus it’s so much easier. Being happy takes a lot more work during these periods. I feel I’ve been ignorant and greedy for too long. I also think my dosage’s too low.. I don’t think one’s supposed to feel like this. Maybe I’ve done that willingly.
Anyway, the others will be up soon and I don’t want to dwell here any longer. Slap on a smile, fix that leak, and face this beautiful rainy day.
Here’s some more photos from the shoot with Julie Pike, for the A New Type Of Imprint copy.
I admire you and your family tremendously! Have a beautiful week 💚🍯(👈🏻the good kind 🙂
😀 THE GOOD KIND! You too!
really like it !… but why do i have sofia coppola on my mind ? 😉
Because she’s fabulous!
indeed, i think its this “playground love” mood in your photographs !
SÅ nydelige bilder! 😍
😀
Some families can be so wonderful for keeping things ‘real’. It is good you can recognise the need to be around others rather than alone and as always I admire you Viktoria for your intelligent insights and for being able to capture in words your complex feelings, and for doing what you need to do to keep things in balance as best you can! The photographer has talent. They are beautiful photos. Thinking of you XO🌲🌈
<3 <3 <3 Thank you Stella!!
like i said before how can we be so close yet so far apart or think similar and be so apart either way family will always be number one priority and its so annoying but so scarce im with u on this one again to dwell willing such a great title 👏
😀 We’re the same!
I understand the family thing, everyone around mine thinks its very weird that my mother,father , brother and i all act like best friends. Thinking that its not normal to spend so much time together. Although i also MUST have my alone time. More often than not. and it gets worse if ive beek with friends too long. The feelings are sometimes a burden to me. But also love knowing that i can be alone. Theres bad sides and good sides.
Did i go off topic?.. Not sure.
Have a good day today. I hope its better than others
Not at all 🙂 I love that you and your family are close! Must be hard with your brother gone. When is he coming home?
Awe! So nice that you remembered about my brother ❤. We flew to kentucky (east coast) and drove with him all the way back to oregon (west coast, where we live) last april, hes been home since. ❤ things are good now. Starting the stages of life of me and him having our first jobs. Im on my last year of community college, hoping to transfer to somewhere in norway next year. Lol i put my lifes story on here, oh well, just something for you to read. ❤ thanks for remembering
<3 <3
Not sure if this is correct blog etiquette to reply but hey rules are for breaking sometimes aren’t they?! 😉 Alyssa I wish you all the very best in following your dreams! 🙂